CALGARY — Staring down at one of the thousands of chalk messages fronting the makeshift memorial for Johnny and Matthew Gaudreau, a pensive Craig Conroy exhaled deeply.
“Reading these…,” said the Flames GM, pausing for the right words as he navigates his way around an ever-growing tribute on the west side of the Saddledome.
“It’s emotional.
“It’s clear he meant something different to every person.
“It wasn’t just the hockey — he meant more to this city as a person. His family meant so much to the city too.”
“It just shows me what a great city we have here. The people, the love, the passion… so special.”
Special like Johnny.
Five days after the two brothers were killed by a suspected drunk driver while cycling on a rural New Jersey road, fans continue to scribble their sentiments on the rink-side asphalt, while leaving thousands of jerseys, sticks, hats, flowers, photos and purple Gatorade on the steps.
And while messages vary from “score us some goals in heaven Johnny,” to, “drunk driving must stop,” there is one that sits alone, 21 steps above the tributes that speaks for the masses.
In orange chalk it reads, “Retire #13 please!!!”
It only makes sense.
Not just in Calgary, but Columbus as well.
No one would dare wear it in either city again anyway.
Following a long weekend of grieving, the organizations are certainly discussing that likelihood internally.
There’s no question the team that drafted and hosted him the first nine years of his career will want to memorialize the diminutive superstar, ensuring his contributions will never be forgotten.
But it’s far too soon for anyone to expect an imminent announcement like that.
Now isn’t the time, as the focus is squarely on mourning and comprehending a loss of this magnitude.
“Little bit too early,” said Conroy, in agreement.
“I’m just thinking about what comes next for the family, and the funeral.
“But I can see why people are talking about that.”
Although only a handful of Gaudreau’s Flames teammates are still with the organization, players and staff members have been offered grief counselling.
No one is quite sure how to proceed, as the family decides how, when and where to hold the funeral.
“Everybody I know wants to go, but that may not be possible,” said Conroy.
It’s a particularly hard time for Conroy, who signed Gaudreau to his first contract, shared the same agent, and was even tasked with minding his dog, Bailey, at times.
“You try to treat all the players the same, but we had a great connection right from the get-go, right up until he left,” said Conroy.
“But so many felt a connection to him and his family. Everywhere I go in the city everybody has a story about how they ran into him one time.
“Those are hard, but I like hearing them.
“You try to think of the positive stuff, but the whole thing is heartbreaking.”
Most of the sentiments scattered around the Dome focus on sending love to the Gaudreau family as they deal with unspeakable pain.
“We talk about close families, and we all have close families, but I’ve never seen a bond with a family quite like the Gaudreaus,” said Conroy.
“And the way they embraced Calgary when Johnny got here was incredible. I used to feel bad for Jane and Guy having to do so many interviews when they visited, but they loved it.”
The love and respect are mutual, as evidenced by the steady stream of well-wishers who continued to visit the rink-side memorial Tuesday.
“That’s what I love about this city,” said Conroy, who saw a similar outpouring of support for Chris Snow and his family a year ago when the assistant GM died of complications from ALS.
“You can’t even put into words what it means.
“We do show our support, what he meant to us, what he did off the ice and how many people he touched in the city.”
In past days, Conroy, Jarome Iginla and Lanny McDonald have shared their love for Johnny, Matthew and the Gaudreaus by sending heartfelt condolences online.
The organization has also paid tribute to the Gaudreaus at Hitmen and Stampeders games.
In due time, the organization will find even more stirring ways to ensure the brothers are honoured, and that the memories and relationship endure.
Trust them to do it the way Johnny Hockey always did — with the perfect touch.